Airports

Location: Gate 9, Oakland airport.
I never realized how much fun it is to sit in an airport while waiting
for a flight. I mean the sheer number of people just wondering around
with that lost look on their face, constantly looking at their boarding
pass, as if it's going to suddenly come to life and direct them where to
go.
Then there are the obnoxious businessmen constantly talking on their
cellphones and talking loudly enough that everyone can hear them, like
we care about their jobs.
Then there's people like me who sit with a book and those everpresent
white iPod headphones snaking out of our bag. Except today I forgot my
book, hence this long rambling post. Until next time
John cochennette

Country of California ...

Dear President Bush,

Congratulations on your victory over all us non-evangelicals. Actually, we're a bit ticked off here in California, so we're leaving.California will now be its own country. And we're taking all the Blue States with us. In case you are not aware, that includes Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois, and all of the North East.

We spoke to God, and he agrees that this split will be beneficial to almost everybody, and especially to us in the new country of California. In fact, God is so excited about it, he's going to shift the whole country at 4:30 pm EST this Friday. Therefore, please let everyone know they need to be back in their states by then.

So you get Texas and all the former slave states. We get the 'Governator', stem cell research and the best beaches. We get Elliot Spitzer. You get Ken Lay. (Okay, we have to keep Martha Stewart, but we can live with that.)We get the Statue of Liberty. You get Opryland. We get Intel and Microsoft. You get WorldCom. We get Harvard. You get Old Miss. We get 85% of America's venture capital and entrepreneurs. You get all the technological innovation in Alabama. We get about two-thirds of the tax revenue, and you get to make the red states pay their fair share. Since our divorce rate is 22% lower than the Christian coalition's, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of single moms to support, and we know how much you like that. Did I mention we produce about 70% of the nation's veggies? But heck the only greens the Bible-thumpers eat are the pickles on their Big Macs.

Oh yeah, another thing, don't plan on serving California wine at your state dinners. From now on it's imported French wine for you. Ouch, bet that hurts.

Just so we're clear, the country of California will be pro-choice and anti-war. Speaking of war, we're going to want all Blue States citizens back from Iraq. If you need people to fight, just ask your evangelicals. They have tons of kids they're willing to send to their deaths for absolutely no purpose. And they don't care if you don't show pictures of their kids' caskets coming home.

Anyway, we wish you all the best in the next four years and we hope, really hope, you find those missing weapons of mass destruction soon. Seriously.

Sincerely,

California

Graveyard

So I'm working a graveyard shift again. I haven't had to do this in a year. But our normal auditor is going on vacation and the not-so-normal one quit last week. Besides that in general I hate working on saturday nights.

Tiger Army

I am so stoked I got tickets today for the Feb 11 Tiger Army show. My friend Summer and (hopefully) my friend Sarah are going with me.
More later.

Stupid AT&T Wireless

After 3 years my cell phone crapped out today. I went down to get a new one and decided to swicth to another carrier. I bought a new Sidekick and went to transfer all my numbers and email addresses from the old phone and surprise surprise AT&T wireless doesn't keep that stuff on the sim chip so I lost everything. I am hoping my friends read this and send me there phone numbers.